Too Much Free Time
by mywickedlyweirdnature
Summary: In Lydia's absence BJ, in a fit of sheer boredom, toys around with her computer and makes an interesting discovery.


Disclaimer: I don't own BeetleJuice, though he would disagree!

As with all of my works (however short they may be) this one is basically a snipet that could have come out of a greater story if I didn't lack the creativity or motivation to write one. Besides it's fun to mess with people. Mwa hah hah!

BeetleJuice is lounging in a chair in front of the t.v. while he waits for Lydia. Suddenly the door swings open announcing her arrival and tearing BJ's eyes away from a show called "Pranks and the Poor Saps at the Receiving End."

BeetleJuice- "Lydz! Glad to see ya finally made it!" he jumps up from his chair, grabs her hand and begins to lead her outside in Doomie's direction.

"I was beginnin to think that ya'd never show! Come on Lydz! If Doom-A-Roo waits any longer I think he's gonna blow a gasket!"

Lydia- "Sorry Beej." She says, disentangling her hand from his.

"Some things have come up and I can't go with you." She said, sighing.

BeetleJuice- "But Lydz! We've been plannin this for days! I had our whole night planned! We were gonna visit Jacques…"

Lydia- (interrupting) "You mean trip up Jacques."

BeetleJuice- "I was gonna go lend the Monster Across the Street a hand."

Lydia- "A foot would be more like it."

BeetleJuice- "and I was even gonna let ya watch me prank…uh…I mean thank Prince Vince for that second rock tour last week."

Lydia- "Beej all you ever want to do is scare the pants off our friends."

BeetleJuice- "Yeah, so what's wrong with that?"

Lydia- "Oh BeetleJuice." She sighs. "What am I going to do with you?"

BeetleJuice- "Well first you're gettin in the car, then you're comin with me, and then we're goin to tour the Neitherworld for new victims."

Lydia- "As tempting as that sounds Beej, I can't. Mom's taking me to look at colleges. We're leaving tonight and making a weekend excursion to a bunch of schools I haven't even heard of, but which are of course artistic in nature." (rolls her eyes)

BeetleJuice- "You're killin me babes! (a knife appears in his chest) Oh great, like I don't have enough on my plate already! (changes into a plate and a giant burger slams him into the ground) Damnit! I still can't get this juice to work right!"

Lydia- "Well now you'll have all weekend to practice perfecting it."

BeetleJuice- "But Lydz…" he loses his train of thought when Lydia hugs him.

Lydia- "Come on BJ. It's just one weekend. It'll be over with before you know it." She releases him and leaves, closing the door behind her and leaving him alone in his own realm.

BeetleJuice- "Easy for you to say." He turns and slouches back into the house.

Several hours later…BeetleJuice who is now bored out of his mind has abandoned the television, radio, and several books in favor of a laptop (hey how the hell do you know they don't have em? They've got every damn thing else!) After searching a multitude of cites without the least bit of interest, he finally comes across a webpage that catches his eye.

BeetleJuice- (reading the screen) "Fanfiction huh? What kind of nerdo freak sits around writin crap about jerks that don't even exist?" (Despite his irritation he continued observing the site, searching for something mildly interesting, hell…just something that didn't suck ass! (Ya see kids free time is dangerous even in small doses.)

"Huh…they've got rules for this crap?" (He reads a rule aloud) "Any story, poem, etc. that doesn't meet pre-stated guidelines with regard to presentation, plot, dialogue, and grammatical style will be deleted." (he pauses) "They have criteria for gettin rid of this junk! Why would ya post this stuff to begin with, especially if you're just gonna take it off later!…People are stupid" (He searches further until he comes across a summary that reads, "I have found the secret to the preservation of life in the Neitherworld, which I have decided to share with all those who click on this story as a token of my appreciation to your interest in my works.") BeetleJuice, intrigued, gave his mouse a click and rushed to read the explanations that began filling up the screen. Several minutes later, after much fluff BJ found what he was looking for. At the bottom of the 30th page was a paragraph that read, "And so my fellow Neitherworldians I have found that the secret to the preservation of not only our afterlives themselves but the way to achieve happiness and riches therein lies in...(story dissappears)

Beetlejuice- "WHAT! YOU'VE GOTTA BE SHITTIN ME! I WAS RIGHT THERE! ( he slumps against the desk and sobs) THE WHOLE SECRET OF LIFE ERASED BECAUSE OF SOME STUPID GRAMMAR RULES! WHO IN THE HELL DOES THAT!

Explanation- I just find rules irritating from time to time, especially when they ruin something good rather than improve upon it.


End file.
